ellipsis: a million conversations that we never thought to start

...I remember those long drives to Disney World while "Man in the Mirror" played on the car radio. Hotel rooms. Dad slept alot, always. The Mickey Mouse doll for my brother's 4th birthday was wrapped in a huge red package. Fisher Price kids flashlights that turned themselves off when we forgot to. Pee Wee's Big Adventure, Look Who's Talking, The Land Before Time, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Independence Day. I remember how you cried when you accidentally ripped our giant Goofy wall stickers... It upset me because you cared so much more than we did. You thought you failed us, but it really didn't matter much... The smell of cedar, and how nothing but the most important things were placed in that old cedar chest... Rest stops, driving down the east coast. Your cherry red pick-up truck. I remember visiting your work, running down that long hallway and banging on the maintenance department door. Would you believe that I walked that same hallway a few months ago? I saw some of the guys you worked with, in the same brown pants and tan work shirts that you always wore. They showed me your badge and a photo of you on the wall. They looked at me like they had seen a ghost. I probably looked the same... The smell of Old Spice and fires in the fireplace. The beach, how you love the beach. Sitting outside on a beach side hotel patio in Daytona Beach with your fingers laced behind your head... Our old dog Kojak was around long before Patrick and I were, a puppy in early photos I remember once seeing. We used to be able to smell him on his collar for a while after he passed away, but now it only smells like the things that have taken its place... World War II, and Trivia on your bedroom floor in the summertime. When you were sleepy, you always asked "Who is buried in Grant's Tomb?" and we knew we had lost you for the night... Did you know that you and Santa Claus have the same handwriting?... You took me to vote for the very first time when I turned 18. You made me feel like what I was doing was important... Christmas trees cut with your very own saw in your own two hands and handmade ornaments, milkshakes, blood red steak, Vietnam. Books. You taught me to love reading and I inherited your illegible script, which I could always read. Chicago and Blood, Sweat, and Tears, "Goodbye, Yellow Brick Road". The Hall of Presidents and One-Dollar Jeopardy, roller coasters, movies, and sledding... You loved the Abraham Lincoln museum in Washington, D.C., and you made it important to me, too... You stopped drinking when I was a toddler. I wish I had stopped before I lost you. I promise I have done right by you now, I just took a few detours... You always put my toys together, and you drove my friend and I to New Jersey and took us to Six Flags. You were so proud of me when I took acting classes, and you were at every performance I ever had, no matter how small the role was... Stained glass and haunted houses in the basement, and the way you could whistle with your mouth closed. Burning everything you attempted to cook, and teaching me to ride a bike... your gold toothed smile...