Rebecca

you are such a distant part of my past, of my history. you knew me at a time in my life when i needed to be liberated. i needed an edge and you let me bite off a piece of yours. you darkened my view, and introduced me to new sights and sounds. you introduced me to a level of individuality i didnt know existed. you set me on my course for tragedy and triumph.

but so it goes, as adolescents enter adulthood, the concept of "best friends" changes. it doesnt always carry over.  you can only watch Rocky Horror so many times before the VHS tape wears thin...

im sure we lived parallel lives for a time, unknowingly. sex, drugs, and rock and roll were where we related. it didnt soften the blow, however, when my cocaine addled brain saw your house for the first time in years. i was secretly horrified to run into you under such circumstances, embarrassed at what i had become. you didnt seem to judge me that night, however, because you were just as fucked up. we parted ways again, living parallel, but miles apart...

its good to know you are alive, Becki. its a miracle we both are.the idea of sitting in your kitchen eating dinner and reminiscing is almost laughable. how domestic, how pedestrian. but i know you, Becki, and you were never one for domestics. that grown up dinner may never happen, and i dont believe for a second that you are moving to Italy this year. i believe that YOU believe it, and thats where we will leave it...

but just so you know, i was so moved when you wrote in your diary that i was your best friend a lifetime ago. i read it while you were trying to fuck my cousin or something. yeah, friendship isnt always textbook... fuck, we tore out the pages and rewrote that one... you were always the one who made me brave enough to change, for better or worse.